Together Together is an unexpected film on fertility because like any film on humanity, it’s not really just about that. At the center of the movie is Matt played by the always likeable Ed Helms, and Anna played by the bitingly funny Patti Harrison. Both have found themselves in lonely circumstances and through the idea of surrogacy then find themselves together, but together together.
Filmmaker Nikole Beckwith was interested in exploring a man’s biological clock with the piece. “It’s never talked about, and I wanted to tell that story. I think that part of feminist culture is changing the way that women are represented on film, but it also means we have to change the way men are represented.”
Anna initially takes on the role of Matt’s surrogate for the money, but Beckwith wanted to defy the tropes of the role of the surrogate here as well: “When we see a surrogacy story it’s often melancholy. Of course there is giving up a child and that’s the hardest choice and sacrifice but when we only tell those stories it can further stigmatize surrogacy. I like to think of it as being additive. It’s creating something and bringing something into the world. There are also so many stories about a woman becoming pregnant, and once pregnant, it eclipses her pre-existing identity and becomes the dominant trait of that person. Anna has had this different experience in the past as a pregnant teen and it derailed not just her relationship with her family, but also her education and the things she saw achieving. In order to be a surrogate you have to have had a child before. Whereas previously that held her back, now it qualifies her to move forward in her life and create a positive experience.”
Regardless of circumstances Harrison’s Anna is incessantly likeable and the chemistry between Harrison and Helms on screen is like the comfort of a warm blanket in the sun, or a really good episode of Friends. Beckwih agrees she hit on something magical with the pair: “They are perfectly cast and I like that it feels like I wrote it for them. Ed is so good even in the broadest and biggest most extreme moments. He imbues everything and is so vulnerable… I wasn’t aware of Patty when writing the film, but in the quest for Anna, I came across her Tonight Show appearance and watching it I just thought-- there’s Anna.”
Beckwith stated the chemistry was even more apparent as soon as they got together: “I brought them to lunch and it’s kind of like setting people up on a date but then you don’t leave. But I knew I was sitting in the middle of something special.”
For the film to succeed the chemistry of the pair was perhaps the most important ingredient. As the baby grows, so does the unexpected friendship. Boundaries are soon crossed. Matt fusses over everything Anna eats, and who she dates, and is soon suggesting maybe she should just move in. Anna is swimming through life hoping to use the surrogate money to go to school but in the meantime living in a tiny apartment and working at a coffee shop with a hilariously clueless yet simultaneously insightful coworker.
Beckwith had to walk the line of codependency and a healthy budding friendship: “I mean I think it’s a spectrum. Codependency is a fine line. When you have your friends, you depend on them. But “codependency” the term is unhealthy. It tells us the sun rises and sets what this person. You wanna be able to depend on each other. To fill a space in your life and a space in your heart you didn't realize was empty until they moved into it. It’s a gift, but also disorienting. I think relationships come in and out of codependency. It depends on what’s going on in life.”
For a time Anna and Matt embrace the codependency, yet they have the literal ticking clock of the arrival of a baby. The time where naturally (and contractually) their relationship is supposed to cease, but it becomes clear that’s a boundary that’s already been broken. These people have acknowledged their eternal tie. The question is how will they handle the bond in their new phase of life, and it turns out that question is enough to drive the movie.
Perhaps that’s because the loneliness of Matt and Anna is palpable and relatable. Although Beckwith very gently reminds that being solitary and being alone are very different: “There are peaks and valleys and a spectrum. Sometimes you can feel exceptionally lonely surrounded by people and not lonely at all in moments of solitude… But yes, we are a generation spending more time alone, and are inherently lonelier. The face of the world is changing, but Matt and Anna are high functioning loners. Part of what brings them together is an understanding of each other and a respect of each other.”
Their loneliness is also unique in that this is a story not easily solved by a romantic relationship. “They are not desperate for companionship,”echoes Beckwith, “It’s more like that thing where someone nestles into a place in your heart you weren’t expecting. I don’t think their loner status is something they are running from, but brings them together for a couple reasons.” Ed Helms’s character Matt has actually created a Loner App. “I like that app,” says a satisfied Beckwith. “It’s interesting. On Tinder and other dating apps the scrolling is a little bit of ‘who else is out in the world looking for things.’ I wanted to create an app or have Matt create an app where you don’t have to approve or reject the person. There’s no pressure or expectations. No rules. It’s just we are in various boats on the same day just kind of waving at each other. That’s nice… I think I wanted to feel less alone in my aloneness.”
While Matt and Anna most certainly do more than just wave, they absolutely, at least for a time, absorb the loneliness that life serves up. They are each other’s needed additives and antidotes, but also nothing more or nothing less, and maybe only for nine months. It’s such a nice notion that a perfect stranger at the exact right time and place can become a forever friend just when one needs it, and Together Together reminds us that sometimes that’s all we need.