Content Warning: The following contains discussions of sexual harassment and assault that some readers might find upsetting. Reader discretion is advised.
This past week, members of our Clubhouse Afro Horror community were victims of unwanted sexual harassment from a fellow member.
The incident opened up a dialogue about boundaries within the horror community, statistically a space that has always been a male-dominated genre. However, as more and more women join the community, more stories of sexual harassment are coming to light.
According to RAINN, the nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization, sexual harassment is defined as "unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature."
Therefore this week, I’m taking a break from our regularly scheduled screenwriting advice to offer three anti-sexual harassment behaviors to practice, courtesy of Dr. Monica D Hinton, PhD. Hinton, who's worked in Mental Health and Substance Abuse for over two decades, came into a public room this week to address sexual harassment behavior and offer consultation.
These were the three main talking points we took from that discussion:
-
IT ONLY TAKES ONE "NO"
In no way, shape or form, should you be sending sexual content to others without their consent. Period. On top of that, consent can be revoked at any time. As soon as a person makes it known they are uncomfortable receiving advancements and the harassment continues, there are now grounds for legal repercussions.
-
THERE IS A LINE BETWEEN “JOKING” AND “HARASSMENTS”
Just because you establish a joking relationship, either publicly or privately, does not mean you have the free range to sexually harass the other person. Consent is important. Just because a person consents to one aspect of a relationship, doesn’t mean they consent to another. If you find yourself in a situation where you are having an open online relationship with another person, do not automatically assume that they want to broaden that relationship to another level without consulting them first. A simple request of permission to identify personal boundaries should be your first step towards cultivating any personal relationship.
-
JUST BECAUSE THE VICTIM DOESN’T SAY STOP, DOESN’T MEAN THEY WANT IT
This is especially true for women. We have been trained since adolescents that “boys will be boys” and we should use humor or coyness to defuse a situation, rather than directness. It is not abnormal for a woman to say, join a dating site, match with a potential partner, and then immediately be accosted with sexual imagery without their consent. This is sexual harassment. It has been ingrained in our “date rape culture” that d*ck pics are just a part of the dating scene, but it doesn’t have to be. Affirming to these offenders that sending sexual imagery without actual consent is unacceptable and also sharing your experience with others are two ways to combat rampant online sexual harassment.
Sexual harassment may seem like a minor affair, especially when compared to physical cases such as Weinstein and Kelly, but sexual harassment is still harassment with very real, long-lasting trauma. The damage can not only cause deep emotional harm to the victims involved but trigger others who have had previous experiences, as well.
To learn more about identifying and addressing sexual harassment, please visit https://leanin.org/sexual-harassment/individuals.